Apocalypse imminent after teen smartphone goes missing

The Universe will implode at midnight if a teenager's smartphone is not recovered, it has emerged. Cosmologists warned today that the 'Big Crunch' is highly likely unless a Samsung Galaxy J3 can be returned to a deeply tormented adolescent. 

"Emma White's prolongued inactivity on social media will eventually cause galaxy collapse, culminating in a supermassive black hole," said a leading theoretical physicist at CERN. "The estimated lifespan of the Sun is no longer 5 billion years. It might be 5 hours. We must find that phone."

According to experts, the ramifications of a 17 year-old's unseen Whatsapp messages have also become inextricably linked to the ultimate fate of the cosmos.

"Don't bloody look at me. I'm not paying for a new one," said Emma's father, Ian, outside his daughter's bedroom. "She's inconsolable in there," he continued. "It's like her world is about to end...hang on a minute, what's that rumbling noise?"

Emma's phone was later found under the sofa. It had zero Whatsapp messages but one missed call from Nanny Pat, who had said she wanted Channel 4.

Created with Mozello - the world's easiest to use website builder.