Couple deriving immense satisfaction from owning bigger house than friends

A Surrey couple is enjoying a deep sense of fulfilment today because their new detached home in Guildford is the largest amongst their peer group. Recently married Tom and Pippa Whittaker are now eagerly arranging a housewarming party to underline the vast difference in floor space when contrasted with the homes of their best friends.

“Look, it’s not a competition, yet it’s disingenuous to say that nobody makes comparisons,” remarked Tom, after gazing longingly at his state-of-the-art barbecue, with over 1,000 square inches of cooking space. “We don’t even boast about our additional investment property in Wimbledon, but we know with absolute certainty that none of our friends owns a second home. George and Sophie have only just bought their first studio flat – it has a pull-down bed for f@ck sake. Meanwhile, Chris and Fiona have moved into a 2-bed flat with shared garden, which is appropriate for them I suppose.”

‘Status tranquillity’ is a new sociological term, which has been coined for couples, like Tom and Pippa, who have reached the top of the social ladder. It encapsulates the idea that life is a win-lose game and that the Number One social position, through conspicuous levels of wealth, can bring a profound sense of peace.

“It’s a shame that our friends are so far behind us,” said Pip, after mulling over the build specification for Tom’s new home cinema. “I monitor a valuation database of all our friends properties, and at the risk of sounding conceited, our home is worth at least 3 times more than Matt and Vanessa in second place. I should also highlight the fact that we paid cash for our investment, whilst everybody else has at least an 80% loan-to-value mortgage. I don’t get bogged down with the numbers, but what else will you talk about at dinner parties with gravely less prosperous couples?"

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